I know a man named D___
There's not much he doesn't know
I don't know anywhere near so much
But then he knows an awful load

I can do quite a bit of stuff
D___ can do so much more
I can't do anywhere near so much
But then he can't do less at all

I should be very jealous of D___
He's so much to be jealous of
I'm not jealous anywhere near that much
Because he's not jealous, he's a love!

Uh Oh ....

Watch out Mr D_oug__

You know what they say .....



Ian

I've mentioned no names thank you very much.

And no, I don't know what 'they' say, but I do know the UCET 'Chit Chat Chatter Back' room is full of drivelling shite, you aspersion casting t*ats!!!

However, I'm STILL your number one fan Ian if ever you fancy a hobbling, and Mr Leahy you're second on the list (that'll learn yous, mwah haha)!!!

What's a "hobbling" ?



Ian

See film adaptation of Misery by Stephen King.

BUT it is gruesome, and I am only joking (in a 'you've gota give as good as you get' sort of way, as I'm actually the epitomy of loveliness as you know)!

Hum, I remember the ankle bashing scene with a lump hammer - James Caan?

I am struggling to find a way to interpret having your ankles smashed with a lump hammer as being the "epitomy of loveliness"

I know I am a helpless sap but strapping 4x4 wood between my ankles and the swinging a lump hammer against them is probably a touch harsher than I deserve .....



Ian

Bit scary but I seem to remember he DID survive.